Definition of insanity

This past weekend we had a LONG road trip . We played near Mont de Marsan, which was in our mission. This is a game we needed to win and didn’t. This is where the definition of insanity comes into play. “Doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results”. I also love one of the great quotes from Kit’s days in the bookfield- “If you always do what you’ve always done you’ll always get what you’ve always gotten”. I bring this up why? Well our team feels that if we keep playing the same way we have been (which has not been very smart) but just play harder , then we will “poof” become better. I have been saying over and over again since day one here that we need to be doing alot more. Not necessarily more BIG things but more LITTLE things. Anyway I am just venting here, the result of our game was 101-86. I finished with 48pts, was 7/11 from 3pt range and worked my buns off getting to the rim for a lot of and ones. But all for not since we didn’t win. I just hope that something good will come of this loss, such as maybe going to the guy that has either the hot hand or a mismatch (me most of the time as I am alot bigger than most of the guys that guard me). Not to mention that I am already the focal point of the other teams’ defense so if the team runs things through me I can even be used as a decoy to free up my teammates. I don’t care about the points if a win doesn’t come with. It feels nice and does alot for my confidence as I get older ( knowing I can still do it) but if my own team doesn’t appreciate my efforts and use me for the reasons they brought me here (to win) then there is really not a whole lot I can do. Kit wants to be our coach and believe it or not she would be very good. After 7 years playing pro ball here in France she has a very good understanding of the game and sees ALOT. Especially when I don’t play well she is sweet enough to remind me of the areas I need to work on and I love her for that! Like Renee says in -Jerry McGuire- “YOU COMPLETE ME” and she does in every-way (Kit, not Renee:) Enough bout that though, we play the last place team this saturday so we SHOULD get back on track.
As for my lovely family Kit has already been working her magic of love and service amongst the sisters here as she dives in head first with her new calling as Relief Society President. She is so thoughtful and such a hard worker when it comes to giving her best to the Lord and those she serves. We talked alot as she started to put her ideas in motion. She expressed her feelings of inadequacy and ” why in the world does everyone else think I will be great”? I find it so amazing how we so often sell ourselves short. We have been blessed with so many things through the gospel, our families and good friends. Through our experiences as missionaries, children, siblings and parents there really should be nothing that can stand in our way of succeeding except US, individually. I do it all the time in basketball. Sometimes I become negative and get down on myself when things don’t go the right way. Or as parents when we do all that we can to teach our children what is good and true and sometimes it doesn’t always stick- we automatically think, “where did I go wrong”?
This last conference was so awesome for combating all this– Elder Eyrings talks were both so powerful. Elder Costa’s talk about never missing opportunities to express love for those around us, Kit and I loved when he would say with his accent - “give a hug and a kisses” so cute! We need to always remember how much we are loved and how we can accomplish anything with the Lord on our side.
Ryn and Elle are shakers and bakers. Elle was recently introduced to the new world of legumes and “Elmers” cereal. Are you kidding me you could use this stuff (rice cereal) as mortar and build an impenetrable fortress. I almost cut myself on some dried cereal that was on her bib. She is adjusting now and we think she might actually start growing now. Her personality is really starting to show and she is quite the giggle happy child. Don’t get me wrong the Jungle Puma still possesses her body every-now and then.
Ryn is still just as cute as ever. Always has to have a dancing skirt on and must be fully “asessorized” with her bracelet,necklace, and of course the purse. She loves to giggle at the dinner table and we have started the family giggle session every-night after she finishes her milk she starts forcing out these giggles and won’t stop until we all join in. We sound like a bunch of drunk hyenas. Elle of course looks around with her birdy face startled at first and then starts giggling uncontrollably. We have so much fun together and love this time together. Below is a clip of Elle giggling please enjoy!

Bitter Sweet

This past week has been fun, we went to the park and played in the autumn leaves. We also love the smell of wood-burning fireplaces and the trees as they change color. This is a time of bitter sweetness though, with the arrival of one beautiful season comes the end of another. Being raised by a master gardener I truly miss the spring and summer seasons, with all their life and warmth and yet it’s amazing to me how the seasons that bring an end to such splendors can still have such appeal and beauty. Autumn with it’s colors and the chill in the air that brings the jackets out of the closet and the fun holidays that spice up the colder months is always exciting.
All this reflection came about as I was on the road this weekend for a game in Bordeaux. I was listening to one of my favorite Cd’s- “Kenny Loggins-More songs from Pooh Corner” and the song “Turn Around” came on. I found myself getting all choked up as the song continued. Here are the lyrics:
Where are you going, my little one, little one

Where are you going, my baby, my own?

Turn around and you’re two, turn around and you’re four

Turn around and you’re a young girl going out of my door

Turn around, turn around Turn around and you’re a young girl going out of my door

Where are you going, my little one, little one

Little dirndls and petticoats, where have you gone?

Turn around and you’re tiny, turn around and you’re grown

Turn around and you’re a young wife with babes of your own

Turn around, turn aroundTurn around and you’re a young wife with babes of your own
Turn around, turn aroundTurn around and you’re the young girl going out of the door
Where are you going, my little one, little one

Where are you going, my ba-by, my own?

The reality of my little angel, Ryn growing up faster and faster really dawned on me, actually it hit me like a Mack truck and I realized I was all teary eyed.
Everyone always talks about how each age has it’s own charm. How even though it’s sad to see the cute baby stages go by the toddler stages are going to bring just as much cuteness. I agree! But at the same time it is so hard for me to see her growing up. We waited so long for her to come to us and now it seems like every-time I turn around she has stopped doing one of the things I loved so much and has now moved on to a newer cute thing. I just have to look at it the same way as the seasons and can’t miss any opportunities to spend time with her and love her at each stage.
I am so grateful for this gift of being a Daddy. It completes me as a man and helps me be a better man. Hearing her ask for me, ” where’s Dad” with her little sweet inflection and hugging me just for no reason at all and squeezing me tight and saying “squeeeeeze”. There is nothing better. I know I will have other “seasons” with Ryn that are just as beautiful and special, as will I with Elle but just as each Christmas or Holiday can hold a special place in our hearts and minds the memories and moments that I have shared with Ryn up until now are just that–memories, but oh so precious to me!

Life as Dad

This has been a great week lots and lots of time together as family. I seriously don’t know how Dads can leave their families every morning to go to work? I am going to have a tough time adjusting when we come home to real life. I just love every aspect of being at home with Kit and my two girls.
Right now my favorite thing is getting Ryn when she wakes up in the morning. She has become so attached to this little Cinderella princess purse (please see video clip above) that my Mom got her for this Christmas (sorry mom she discovered it in our crazy unpacking session and wont’ part with it) that she, upon seeing it in the morning sitting next to her crib, immediately starts up a conversation with it. And when we come through the door she gives us a big ” Hi Dad or Hi Mom” and then points and says ” da purse, da purse”. We think somewhere along the line we are related to the fantasy island guy. Anyway we usually trade days but I love going downstairs with Ryn while Kit and Elle sleep and get her breakfast and then we curl up on the couch together and watch Little Einsteins. The other day we went for an early morning tricycle ride to say good morning to her friends the cows and encountered a swarm of orange and purple butterflies. Ryn was going nuts she could barely even breath running around pointing and saying “butter-FLIES” and saying “awesome”.
She has also really exploded in her learning recognizing letters like m,z,o,s and her colors as well. She really loves to learn and spending all this time with her I can really appreciate the awesome responsibility it is to teach them. They are sponges and constantly learning from us. Kit and I noticed the other day that Ryn was doing this frustrated growl/sigh thing when she would drop something and realized that she learned that from us, we make that sound often when we are frustrated!
But I truly do love being around them all the time and hope that they love having me around too! Whenever Ryn hears me coming down the stairs she takes off running to Kit saying “Oh no Oh no” because she knows I am going to tickle her and do kissyface. We just are so blessed to have them in our lives. President Eyring spoke of writing down everyday the ways that the Lord has blessed us or our family. This blog really has given me that opportunity to put my feelings down somewhere. Although it is not very hard to think of how the Lord has blessed us when we have these two sweet girls with us all day long. Of course there are so many ways that He touches our lives everyday, but having children really helps me not get to caught up in “grown-up things” so that I can always remember that I am still a child needing to learn just as much as my children everyday. I only have years and experience on them but they help me keep things simple and it is when things are simple that we can appreciate the -butterflies-the flowers-tickletime and kissyface and be able to be constantly reminded of our Heavenly Fathers love for each one of us.

MIA-Long update

Well here I am. Back after a few days of stress, big decisions and the normal go-go-go :) Before we came back to France( during the summer) our Branch President called us and extended the calling of Relief Society President to Kit. She of course accepted and then went on to tell me how unprepared she felt for this calling . All she really knew was the Young Womens program as she has served as President everywhere we have lived for the past 7 years. I know she will do great------- Upon returning we found out that the former RS president was having surgery to remove some cancerous tumors. Unfortunately she passed away before the surgery even took place. This came as a big shock ( Claudette was 69). The family asked us to sing her favorite hymn "Au Jardin" . But the sweetest most tender moment of the whole event came when we arrived at the funeral home and Ryn seeing Ben (Claudette's son) squirmed from my grasp, dropped her favorite purse and went running to him with open arms. He of course scooped her up and she gave him a "squeeze" and a kiss on the cheek. He said," Wow what a welcome, just what I needed".Our hearts melted!
I then gave Pierre, the husband, a hug and told him how sorry we were. He is the most adorable man ever, he actually was the branch president in Niort where I served for 4 months as a missionary, 11 years ago! ----Am I that old:( Ryn again without any prodding leaned over to him and kissed him on the cheek and then put her arms around him and started patting him on the shoulder with her tiny little hands. He starting crying and thanked me for bringing my "little angel".Kit and I were amazed at Ryn's ability to comfort those in need. She has always been good at it, but in the past it was people she was really familiar with. Ben and his father were still somewhat strangers to her. She has seen them at church before but only really in passing .
I am so thankful to Heavenly Father for sending us these sweet angels that are so very close to Him. Children are so incredible- loving others, even strangers comes so naturally to them. They truly are the pure in heart and are sent to us to help us be better and understand the love that our Father in Heaven has for us. I now better comprehend the love he has for me and all of His children now that I am a father and have that power to love that my parents always tried to explain to us as children. ---"You will never know how much we love each of you, until you have children of your own". And you know what........they were right!!! Thanks for the love Mom and Dad.
Again along the same theme of children understanding what real love is... this morning Kit and I were snuggling on the couch while Ryn was playing with her toys. When she turned and saw us though, she came running over to us and scurried up into our laps and started hugging us both. She pushed our faces together for a family kiss . I guess the quote that says--"The best thing a father can do for his kids is show them how much he loves their mother"-- is right on!
We prayed a lot and are greatful for all of the great advice and prayers of so many to help us in our decision, to stay here or go home. We feel that we do need to be here to help in any way we can. From basketball to serving in our callings to allowing Ryn this time to learn some more french. After all it's only for another 7 months, we might be done after this year and wanted to soak up as much as we could of sightseeing, chocolate,pastries, and just this time together.
A quick note on our last game we lost 76-106. Yep a real smackdown! Our team just was not ready to play. At the end of the 1st half it was 39-53 and I had 21 of the 39. I was so frustrated during the game because the guys they had guarding me just couldn't. They were too slow, too young or whatever but I had to keep begging for the ball. You would think that after lastyear (leading scorer,MVP of our division) they would want to use me .Forget the fact that they are paying me. But if they want results then they need to go with what is working.If it's me great, if it's someone else great too! I dont care I just want to win. I finished with 34pts. We are 1-1.